Called out.

So it has come to my attention that several particularly attentive individuals have taken note of my bloggersphere absence – and since THEY were kind enough not to call me onto the carpet harshly, I will have to do the honors.

Why haven’t I been blogging lately?
Simple. I have not been running. Well, that’s not entirely true.I can recall several all-out sprints to catch the bus in recent weeks, but that’s not exactly what we are talking about now is it?I could just take the high road and leave it at that. Admit that I have been slacking off and renew my commitment to finish the C25k program. But that’s not what I’m going to do. Rather, I have prepared a lengthy list of excuses that I hope will mediate some of my own responsibility for recent sedentarism.

1. Mid-Terms.You should have seen this one coming – several of my blogs leading up to my mysterious absence reference my looming exams and research papers and question whether or not I can continue to keep up with my running schedule under the added stress. Well, we have our answer – I could not. Somewhere underneath the stacks of my own research and the 60 exams to-be-graded for my TAship, my running shoes were buried.

2.Visitors. Big_Shoe’s had his favorite man-panion come to visit for a week over St. Patty’s day. After pulling several all-nighters for my mid-terms, I took full advantage of the excuse to get out into the city and play tourist.The sun was out, the air was crisp– but I somehow managed to ignore how perfect the weather would be for running and went to the beach instead.

3.Rain.What was that about gorgeous weather?It is a fickle friend indeed. After said sunshine we received four days of massive rain storms. I’m from Seattle, I can handle my rain. But this was beyond me. Anyone know how to avoid soggy shoes? Is there a rubber sock product out there I don’t know about?

4.Leaky Apartment. By day two of aforementioned rainstorm, my apartment was taking in considerable amounts of water. Note: I live on the second floor of my building. How does this happen?!It was coming in through the brick outside, which apparently has an enormous crack in it. Good to know. The walls were soaked through and massive air-bubbles popped up underneath the surface of the paint.We were mopping and emptying drip buckets every hour for two days, After the rain subsided, maintenance came in, threw some spackle on the walls, and told me we were good. I gave them the side-eye but won’t be able to test their handy work until the next storm (which is currently underway...)

That’s all I got right now, but I will be sure to update the list as more come to mind. Excuses are important, especially for a procrastinator like myself. You know what else is important? Mental health. And if there is anything I have noticed since stopping my running schedule it has been that I feel more stressed out, more overwhelmed, and less happy. It is difficult to wake up in the morning that I know is going to be a hard day and feel like going running.Even more difficult to come home at the end of that long day and tie on my running shoes.And at least right now, it feels like these hard days are not few and far between, but every day.I mean, it’s my university’s spring break this week and I am still worried about how I am going to get through the week, never mind get ahead. The good thing is, I can see an end in sight: August 15 the day I finish my degree and set off on my cross-country road trip.And while I do believe I will somehow get everything done between now and then, I am not sure that my mental health will make it through intact.The only solution to this, for me, is to recommit myself to running (and blogging!) for my own sake.30 minutes a day, plus 10 or 15 to blog and track my miles, is really not that much, and if it helps me to feel better about myself, more confident in my abilities, and more balanced in my life, than it seems like an investment that I can’t afford to pass up. Even if in every other part of my life I am accountable to someone else, I can at least be accountable to myself in this.

So what’s the plan then? That’s where it gets tricky. I honestly have no idea. At the moment, it is pouring down rain and it looks like it will continue for at least three days. I feel buried under a never-ending pile of books and articles, papers, assignments, grading and even when I dig myself out enough to look around all I see is a messy apartment and a looming list of deadlines. I honestly can’t say I will run tomorrow. Or even the next day. But I do want to get back on track this week.I am thinking that I will just get out there, set my timer, and just see how far I get.Depending on how long I can run, I will know how many weeks I need to repeat to get back on track to run my first 5k by this spring.Even if I am back at square one, I’ll be happy to have something that I am doing for myself that makes me feel good for a change.

So uh... give me another shot, okay? I promise to make it up to you!